Same Song, Second Verse

We have had a couple of difficult days. Thank heavens that we finally have been able to aleviate most of the back pain...at some cost, I might add. Neither Kenny nor I got any sleep Thursday night. In fact, I had a meltdown about 4:00 AM. Poor Papa. He was such a dear, when he realized how upset I was. He tried to apologize to me when I was the one who needed to apologize. The upshot of the incident was that, at 4 AM, I sent the physician an email telling him that we needed a new plan for pain. At 8 AM, I called our Hospice nurse and told her the same thing. (She had witnessed some of the pain on Thursday.) We were finally able to get some help with the meds. Now we take twice the amount of Methidone - he was on a low dose initially. Today, he was extremely disoriented all day, more than likely due to the opiate.

This morning early, we had an oxygen scare. He got a little winded getting himself into the wheelchair to go into the bathroom to brush his teeth and comb his beautiful white hair. By the time he was in his recliner, he was in full panic mode due to some shortness of breath which was exacerbated by his anxiety. We hooked him up to the oxygen and upped the concentration which helped his actual condition but it took hours to calm him down. He is very difficult to distract in times like that. We are fearful that his congestive heart failure is worsening. It looks like his Lasix is not as effective as it has been in the past so we have discontinued it and substituted Bumex, which I assume is anothe diuretic. We also have some Lorazepam to help with the breathlessness and also the anxiety. (Before long I am really going to speak "medicine" fluently.) He has eaten little today and went to bed at 6PM so I am hoping that tomorrow will find him more clear headed and hungry. Dr. Sasser has given me a little latitude in dosing him with the Methidone. We know that 1 cc every 4 hours is too little and 2ccs every 4 hours may be too much so we are experimenting with both the dosage and the interval between doses to see what keeps the pain at bay but still allows him some lucidity (is that a word?) Anyway, I am not only a caregiver but can now qualify to run an experimental medical lab. I am not sure that Kenny would relish knowing that he is my guinea pig.
however.

At the present time, Kenny is on oxygen again and Larry and I have a better grasp of what needs to be done should the situation arise again. Please keep all of us in your prayers - that we are able to find the best combination of dosage and frequency that will allow him to maintain the optimum quality of life for as long as possible. Thank you all for keeping us in your hearts, your thoughts and your prayers. We wish for all of you a pleasant Palm Sunday tomorrow and a blessed Holy Week, this coming week. I always look forward to Holy Week and especially Good Friday; they make Easter so much more meaningful. I hope I will have better news for you tomorrow. God bless!